You held my hand and the lid of the jar in my stomach let loose all of the butterflies.
Had you not seized my breath, they would have flown out of my mouth as I exhaled.
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Friday, October 19, 2012
Dream: Charging Rhinos
I have very vivid dreams all of the time and I tend to remember them. I like to look up dream interpretations for shakes and gigs. I don't believe anything it says, but it keeps me entertained.
Rhinoceros
To see a rhinoceros in your dream suggests that you need to forge ahead toward your goals. Do not take "no" for an answer or let any obstacles sidetrack you from your destination. You need to be more aggressive.
So this is funny because I had a dream last night that a few of my guy friends were tied up in the middle of a concrete island by an evil lady pirate. I suddenly come to the rescue on a quad. I'm speeding down this bridge surrounded by water and quickly falling to pieces. Charging straight at me on this bridge were rhinos. At first, I am intimidated. then I just let out a yell and held my fist forward. It was a risk and I wasn't sure if I would win the fight (actually I was pretty sure I would lose), but I wasn't going to get anywhere backing down. So I charged right back at the rhino, punching it square in the horn and it fell to the side. Then there was another rhino... same thing. I was soon in an endless game of jousting with a line of rhinos and kicking ass! After a while, the rhinos started to forfeit. they soon started charging to the side so as to avoid me. Then after a break in the bridge and barely making it over the water, an elephant was in the middle. I was 99.9% sure that I was going to lose... but I held my fist out once again and as soon as this happened, the elephant stepped to the side. Then the bridge had an even larger break. My quad couldn't jump this one so I left it in the water and (how convenient) these two person jet skis were right next to where I landed. I swam up to one, got on and started heading toward the island, ready to kick some pirate ass... then my alarm went off. You have no idea how angry I was. I seriously woke up and said "Damnit! I was just about to kick some ass!". Sometimes... I really hate waking up.
And just for shakes and gigs:
Water
To see water in your dream symbolizes your subconscious and your emotional state of mind. Water is the living essence of the psyche and the flow of life energy. It is also symbolic of spirituality, knowledge, healing and refreshment.
Elephant
To see an elephant in your dream indicates that you need to be more patient or more understanding of others. Or perhaps there is a memory that you are holding on to for too long. You need to let go of the past. The elephant is also a symbol of power, strength, faithfulness and intellect. Alternatively, the elephant's introverted personality may be a reflection of your own personality.
To dream that you are afraid of the elephant suggests that there is an enormous problem that you are afraid to confront.
Bridge
To dream that you are crossing a bridge signifies an important decision or a critical junction in your life. This decision will prove to be a positive change filled with prosperity and wealth in the horizon. Bridges represent a transitional period in your life where you will be moving on to a new stage. If the bridge is over water, then it suggests that your transition will be an emotional one. If you fall off the bridge and into the water, then the dream indicates that you are letting your emotions hold you back and prevent you from moving forward. Alternatively, the bridge may indicate that you are trying to "bridge" or connect two things together.
To see a bridge collapse in your dream implies that you have let an important opportunity pass you by.
Jet Ski
To see or dream that you are on a jet ski represents a journey of self-discovery. You are confronting and exploring aspects of your subconscious in full force. Alternatively, the dream relates to some sexual adventure or relationship.
^ I think that one's my favourite.
Rhinoceros
To see a rhinoceros in your dream suggests that you need to forge ahead toward your goals. Do not take "no" for an answer or let any obstacles sidetrack you from your destination. You need to be more aggressive.
So this is funny because I had a dream last night that a few of my guy friends were tied up in the middle of a concrete island by an evil lady pirate. I suddenly come to the rescue on a quad. I'm speeding down this bridge surrounded by water and quickly falling to pieces. Charging straight at me on this bridge were rhinos. At first, I am intimidated. then I just let out a yell and held my fist forward. It was a risk and I wasn't sure if I would win the fight (actually I was pretty sure I would lose), but I wasn't going to get anywhere backing down. So I charged right back at the rhino, punching it square in the horn and it fell to the side. Then there was another rhino... same thing. I was soon in an endless game of jousting with a line of rhinos and kicking ass! After a while, the rhinos started to forfeit. they soon started charging to the side so as to avoid me. Then after a break in the bridge and barely making it over the water, an elephant was in the middle. I was 99.9% sure that I was going to lose... but I held my fist out once again and as soon as this happened, the elephant stepped to the side. Then the bridge had an even larger break. My quad couldn't jump this one so I left it in the water and (how convenient) these two person jet skis were right next to where I landed. I swam up to one, got on and started heading toward the island, ready to kick some pirate ass... then my alarm went off. You have no idea how angry I was. I seriously woke up and said "Damnit! I was just about to kick some ass!". Sometimes... I really hate waking up.
And just for shakes and gigs:
Water
To see water in your dream symbolizes your subconscious and your emotional state of mind. Water is the living essence of the psyche and the flow of life energy. It is also symbolic of spirituality, knowledge, healing and refreshment.
Elephant
To see an elephant in your dream indicates that you need to be more patient or more understanding of others. Or perhaps there is a memory that you are holding on to for too long. You need to let go of the past. The elephant is also a symbol of power, strength, faithfulness and intellect. Alternatively, the elephant's introverted personality may be a reflection of your own personality.
To dream that you are afraid of the elephant suggests that there is an enormous problem that you are afraid to confront.
Bridge
To dream that you are crossing a bridge signifies an important decision or a critical junction in your life. This decision will prove to be a positive change filled with prosperity and wealth in the horizon. Bridges represent a transitional period in your life where you will be moving on to a new stage. If the bridge is over water, then it suggests that your transition will be an emotional one. If you fall off the bridge and into the water, then the dream indicates that you are letting your emotions hold you back and prevent you from moving forward. Alternatively, the bridge may indicate that you are trying to "bridge" or connect two things together.
To see a bridge collapse in your dream implies that you have let an important opportunity pass you by.
Jet Ski
To see or dream that you are on a jet ski represents a journey of self-discovery. You are confronting and exploring aspects of your subconscious in full force. Alternatively, the dream relates to some sexual adventure or relationship.
^ I think that one's my favourite.
Friday, October 12, 2012
The Chase
I'm always chasing the people who don't want me,
And taking the people chasing me for granted.
Maybe I'll stop and let them catch up a bit,
But lord knows that when they get here, I'm going to take off again.
I'm never going to give up chasing those people that I want,
regardless of how long they run away for.
But now I will carry along the people who do want me.
They remind me that I don't actually need you...
I've got all I need.
But one must always strive for their desires.
When I want something, I mean truly want something...
I will put my all into getting it.
And I want you.
And so long as I keep these people with me,
The moment I grab you...
If you are to push me back (as you do),
Those people will be right behind me to catch me and slingshot me back in your direction...
And I will continue the chase.
And taking the people chasing me for granted.
Maybe I'll stop and let them catch up a bit,
But lord knows that when they get here, I'm going to take off again.
I'm never going to give up chasing those people that I want,
regardless of how long they run away for.
But now I will carry along the people who do want me.
They remind me that I don't actually need you...
I've got all I need.
But one must always strive for their desires.
When I want something, I mean truly want something...
I will put my all into getting it.
And I want you.
And so long as I keep these people with me,
The moment I grab you...
If you are to push me back (as you do),
Those people will be right behind me to catch me and slingshot me back in your direction...
And I will continue the chase.
Just Do It
Just do it.
Just go out and fuckin' do it.
Live life your own way.
Enough lying around and dreaming.
Enough waiting around for someone to come along and hold your hand.
You have the power.
You've just got to stand up.
Open the door along with your mind.
Look for beauty in the things we call ugly.
Challenge yourself, but also give yourself some slack.
Smile more.
Laugh more.
It's okay to be happy.
It's okay to be okay with being happy.
Misfortune will come along on their own time.
We must not seek it.
Just be your own.
Don't settle for the lesser you.
You're better than that.
Just take a deep breath.
Just open your eyes.
Just start walking.
Just smile.
Just do it.
Just go out and fuckin' do it.
Live life your own way.
Enough lying around and dreaming.
Enough waiting around for someone to come along and hold your hand.
You have the power.
You've just got to stand up.
Open the door along with your mind.
Look for beauty in the things we call ugly.
Challenge yourself, but also give yourself some slack.
Smile more.
Laugh more.
It's okay to be happy.
It's okay to be okay with being happy.
Misfortune will come along on their own time.
We must not seek it.
Just be your own.
Don't settle for the lesser you.
You're better than that.
Just take a deep breath.
Just open your eyes.
Just start walking.
Just smile.
Just do it.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Bird Leaving the Nest
And as the wall begins to crack
I'm sticking tacks in a world map
and dreaming
And as my heart begins to grow
I'm sticking post-its on a globe
And the floor beneath my toes is sinking
So here I go on the road of no return
I set this building on fire, but I won't stay to watch it burn
I'm jumping out the window and hoping for the best
It's time to move on. This bird is now leaving the nest.
I'm sticking tacks in a world map
and dreaming
And as my heart begins to grow
I'm sticking post-its on a globe
And the floor beneath my toes is sinking
So here I go on the road of no return
I set this building on fire, but I won't stay to watch it burn
I'm jumping out the window and hoping for the best
It's time to move on. This bird is now leaving the nest.
The Fisherman's Fate (Con't)
Back in July of 2010 I posted part of a story/poem called "The Fisherman's Fate". I never knew where to go with it. Then around... early Spring of this year (I think) I wrote a bit more, but didn't post it. It was 3am. Something hit me and I had to put it in the story. It's kind of dark... I was emotionally mixed up at the time. I didn't want to post it right away. The situation was too raw for me to get the courage to share this sensitive story with others.
I'm not sure whether I want to keep all that I've added to it or not. I think that even if it does change, it'll be nice to see how it evolved. It's an ongoing story. I don't know if this is the last that I'll ever add to it or not. That's kind of the excitement of it all. Anyway, here it is:
The Fisherman's Fate:
A fisherman floats on the wide ocean waters
He sits in his boat where he dreams and he ponders
And out in the blue he hears a distinct voice
Accompanied by sounds of sorrow and rejoice
The melody gets louder. It surrounds him and then
A woman appears with a sparkling fin
The fisherman speaks without hardship or thought
Not knowing that soon his charisma will rot
"Hello, my dear. You hold such a sweet song."
And here is the moment that it all goes wrong
Their eyes give a kiss and all is now hushed
In awe and in panic, his face becomes flushed
His body grows weak. There is shaking in his legs.
He has to break away from this frightening gaze
"Away with you now, Medusa of the sea
It's much too dangerous to have you near me."
In that summer gaze, the tide seemed to turn
The ocean has drowned him in an unfeasible yearn
Back home all the fisherman's friends ask why
Why he ran away unto which he replies
"Why with all the worthy fish in the sea
Why would she ever choose to swim with me?
I breathe the air and I have two feet
And I act like a fool every time that we meet."
The fisherman hides. Visions eat away at his mind.
Searching for answers that he can not find.
What is this spell? What is the hitch?
That moment of rapture. A moment so rich.
He has to see her again. He can't hide anymore.
He has to find reason before his head becomes sore.
He grabs all of his gear and heads into the blue.
Coaching himself on what he will do.
His stomach is in knots, his hands are like ice.
He sits desperately hoping that his visit will suffice.
As she comes to the surface, his speech is destroyed.
Loses what is left of his nerve and soon becomes coy.
She gives him a smile so beautiful. A work of art.
Just then she swam her way right into his heart.
She asks him to swim, to see her world for a night.
He wants nothing more than to be by her side.
He tries hard to act natural. So hard to stay afloat.
Spends the whole night in silence then sleeps in his boat.
In the morning he fumbles forgetting where he is.
Splashing around, his mind in a fizz.
The captivator soon rises and gives him a fish.
There is no better morning that he could have wished.
They say their goodbyes as she guides him out.
From there on after, it was all he could think about.
Back home the fishermen ask once again.
Why he still fears her and keeps all his feelings in.
"Why with all the worthy fish in the sea
Why would she ever choose to swim with me?
I breathe the air and I have two feet
And I act like a fool every time that we meet."
He tries to relax and only visit now and then.
Hoping that he can start seeing her as a friend.
It is certain to him that she wants nothing more.
So he settles down and finds someone else to adore.
Many days pass and he lives his own life.
Fading slowly away from that long and hard strife.
He sets out to sea, his new love by his side.
To show her the sights, and hear the song of the tide.
He finds his old friend and greets her with love.
Feeling confident again. He can not be drugged.
But just then she spoke words that gave him a chill
And then once again, his body becomes ill.
How can he be so weak? How can he explain?
How can he ever show his face? He is just so ashamed.
And just in that moment he begins to realize.
That there is no killing that first look in her eyes.
Though he found love in more places than one.
Nothing has resolved what he has begun.
And you will find him in the sea of fear and regret
Drowning in a gaze, he cannot seem to forget.
I'm not sure whether I want to keep all that I've added to it or not. I think that even if it does change, it'll be nice to see how it evolved. It's an ongoing story. I don't know if this is the last that I'll ever add to it or not. That's kind of the excitement of it all. Anyway, here it is:
The Fisherman's Fate:
A fisherman floats on the wide ocean waters
He sits in his boat where he dreams and he ponders
And out in the blue he hears a distinct voice
Accompanied by sounds of sorrow and rejoice
The melody gets louder. It surrounds him and then
A woman appears with a sparkling fin
The fisherman speaks without hardship or thought
Not knowing that soon his charisma will rot
"Hello, my dear. You hold such a sweet song."
And here is the moment that it all goes wrong
Their eyes give a kiss and all is now hushed
In awe and in panic, his face becomes flushed
His body grows weak. There is shaking in his legs.
He has to break away from this frightening gaze
"Away with you now, Medusa of the sea
It's much too dangerous to have you near me."
In that summer gaze, the tide seemed to turn
The ocean has drowned him in an unfeasible yearn
Back home all the fisherman's friends ask why
Why he ran away unto which he replies
"Why with all the worthy fish in the sea
Why would she ever choose to swim with me?
I breathe the air and I have two feet
And I act like a fool every time that we meet."
The fisherman hides. Visions eat away at his mind.
Searching for answers that he can not find.
What is this spell? What is the hitch?
That moment of rapture. A moment so rich.
He has to see her again. He can't hide anymore.
He has to find reason before his head becomes sore.
He grabs all of his gear and heads into the blue.
Coaching himself on what he will do.
His stomach is in knots, his hands are like ice.
He sits desperately hoping that his visit will suffice.
As she comes to the surface, his speech is destroyed.
Loses what is left of his nerve and soon becomes coy.
She gives him a smile so beautiful. A work of art.
Just then she swam her way right into his heart.
She asks him to swim, to see her world for a night.
He wants nothing more than to be by her side.
He tries hard to act natural. So hard to stay afloat.
Spends the whole night in silence then sleeps in his boat.
In the morning he fumbles forgetting where he is.
Splashing around, his mind in a fizz.
The captivator soon rises and gives him a fish.
There is no better morning that he could have wished.
They say their goodbyes as she guides him out.
From there on after, it was all he could think about.
Back home the fishermen ask once again.
Why he still fears her and keeps all his feelings in.
"Why with all the worthy fish in the sea
Why would she ever choose to swim with me?
I breathe the air and I have two feet
And I act like a fool every time that we meet."
He tries to relax and only visit now and then.
Hoping that he can start seeing her as a friend.
It is certain to him that she wants nothing more.
So he settles down and finds someone else to adore.
Many days pass and he lives his own life.
Fading slowly away from that long and hard strife.
He sets out to sea, his new love by his side.
To show her the sights, and hear the song of the tide.
He finds his old friend and greets her with love.
Feeling confident again. He can not be drugged.
But just then she spoke words that gave him a chill
And then once again, his body becomes ill.
How can he be so weak? How can he explain?
How can he ever show his face? He is just so ashamed.
And just in that moment he begins to realize.
That there is no killing that first look in her eyes.
Though he found love in more places than one.
Nothing has resolved what he has begun.
And you will find him in the sea of fear and regret
Drowning in a gaze, he cannot seem to forget.
The Cliff of Fear
I'm holding hands with the goddess of courage
One foot off the cliff of fear
I don't know where it is I'm going
But I know I won't be standing here
One foot off the cliff of fear
I don't know where it is I'm going
But I know I won't be standing here
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